Why Settle....Its just not right

This past weekend, we traveled to Richmond to go to a show. So we went a day early just to have a night out and be away. Anyway by the time we arrived it was almost 8:30 p.m. being tired we decided just to eat at the hotel. As always I study the menu reading options, looking at ingredients to figure out what to have. Most of the options sounded good, but I decided to get Pork Osso Buco. I had just made veal osso buco a few days early, so I wanted to see how I paired to a restaurant. Although this was pork and mines was veal all of the recipes I have ever seemed pretty much had the same ingredients with a few variations. I actually misread the menu for what the dish included. For some reason I thought it said Risotto with barley. When my plate came, It looked okay, but was not what I had expected. I was hoping it tasted better than what it looked. There were two shanks on the plate on top of Risotto and a sauce drizzled around the plate.

I began to eat my meal and soon discovered it was not what I was hoping for. The risotto was actually all barley and not a good flavor and I was not particular about the texture of it. The shanks were a little dry but I was hoping as I cut them up, the inside would be more tender and pleasing. Well it was not. I dipped it in the sauce again hoping it would come out different. Still it was not good. My husband asked me how did it taste. As I said pass me the salt and pepper. I told him it was not great. So right after the waiter walked by and asked the same, I said everything was fine. I thought to myself, why did I just say it was fine and it was not. I was thinking this cost $21.00 a plate so I should get some kind of gratification out of it. But I think many times we say things are okay when they are not.

So what's my That for this post: Often times, we enter into relationships or friendships hoping that they are something wonderful. We have our own interpretation of what is presented to us and what this other person may bring to the table. But like with this meal, I did not ask the waiter as I typically do anything about what I was about to eat. Just like with people we often look past the details and dive in. Then we begin to notice whats wrong and keep trying different things to make it better, but in the long run you are still left with what was originally presented. Then we soon realize we have settled for something we really did not want. Like when the waiter asked me did I like my meal, I should have said no. For whatever reason this time I did not and settled for what was there and was disappointed. How many times do we do that in real time and real life. You settle for what is there and never question it, you try to correct it, add to it, change it but you cant change something that was already there if you did not do it in the beginning. For instance, if my shanks were prepared different they may have tasted different. When you are in a relationship/friendship do you look at what the ingredients are, what each person is doing and gauge its appropriateness for what you are looking for? If its not what are you doing to change it. After my shank was done, I could not change the texture, the taste or anything because I did not prepare it. Just like you did not create the other person that you are going through your experiences with. You can not change them and they can not change you. It has to be self actualization and realization that change needs to occur.When someone says "Is everything okay" How do you respond? Do you give an answer to satisfy the other person and you suffer in silence. Well suffering in silence helps no one, especially not you. What happens, you finally walk away unfulfilled, unsatisfied and wanting something else. Most of it could have been avoided if we would be honest in all situations no matter how big or how small. Can you tell a waiter you are not pleased with your meal and not worry about it. Can you tell your friend there is something wrong in our friendship, and overcome whatever it is and remain friends. Can you do this in any relationship and work to fix it or if can not be fixed can you leave that relationship. Just like I left my food on the plate because for me it was not edible.

My realization is, if I would have just simply told the waiter that I did not like my meal and replaced it with something else, I would not have been so disappointed by the end. My excuse that night was I was just so tired and hungry that I did not feel like waiting for another meal or anything, I just wanted to eat and go to bed. I think we have all been in the situation where we did not want to wait and was just tired of things in life, so we have settled for one thing or another. But, next time I challenge you not to settle-you know what you need, what you desire and what is satisfying to you. What will you do to make the next thing better? Its all up to you.